Ever since Art Modell forced two of the greatest people in football to leave Cleveland, the Browns have been perennial losers, and were the only non-expansion team to never have won a Super Bowl.  Many old fans promised that they just wanted one Super Bowl title before they died.  Well, in the 2022-2023 season, the Browns did just that.  With the revolutionary T formation, the Browns really resembled the teams of the 1950’s.  No team could stop their offensive attack.  And on January 22nd, when the Browns punched their ticket to Super Bowl 56, Cleveland emergency response got a record 2,567 calls from bars, pubs, and retirement facilities.  A mass heart attack outbreak erupted as many people who had suffered their whole lives finally saw the Browns get over the hump to a Super Bowl.  Of the 2,567 calls, all but 81 came back, saying “I just need to see them win one before I go.” It was reported that of the other 81 calls, 58 were fans of another team, and 23 not fans of football.  The Browns were not expected to win the Super Bowl, as the vaunted Tampa Bay Buccaneers were seemingly unstoppable.  Many experts cite the shock of this win as the main reason for the rush of fatal heart attacks in relatively healthy older gentlemen.  But as some of the older doctors at the Cleveland clinic said, “We finally won one, most of these guys got what they wanted and went out on top.”  This massive death toll took about 10% of Cleveland’s population, which left many vacancies in jobs, as well as season tickets for some of the best spots in Browns stadium.